Personal feelings of emptiness, in which there is almost no emotions, motivation, sense of direction, or purpose happen – truly they are part of our life’s journey. In general, societies provide all sorts of escapes and gratifications to mask over the emptiness. But, teaching people about emptiness, and providing support during these necessary times is still very much lacking. Individuals are either embarrassed to share that they are going through a time of emptiness, or have not been taught that these are times to share with others. Unfortunately, friends and family often do not know what to say or do. Counselors not trained in transitional psychology that acknowledges, gives credibility, and provides training to support a person through such times, may only add to the isolating feelings of such emptiness. So, this section has been added for you.
The first support is to again say that these times of feeling personally empty, even though your life may be over-full with life activities, are a necessary part of your life journey. When “baby teeth” fall out and the gums are bare, parents reassure their child that new larger teeth will fill that place. Some cultures even have a tradition of “tooth fairies” who come during sleep and put a coin under the child’s pillow as a gift of reassurance and caring. Too bad in a way that we do not have “emptiness fairies” who place wisdom and supportive sayings under our pillows for us to read before bed and during the day….
The second support is to say, like baby teeth falling out, a new sense of life that is “larger” than the previous can emerge if we understand, are patient (remember it takes time for those permanent teeth to emerge). You should receive the type of support you think will help you the best. As you increase your relationship with yourself (Relado section on your relationship with you), you can better know what kind of support will help you endure the emptiness, and keep faith that there is interior growth going on (like those permanent teeth that have not yet emerged). Sages would say that only an empty cup can be filled with new living water.
The third support is to say that unlike permanent teeth that emerge, times of personal emptiness will repeat as your personal integration continues. Thus, if you can hold onto this perspective: “Ah, let me not panic, or even fear, my integration is “in process.” Now, there is a similarity in that sometimes the integration may emerge a little “crooked,” like permanent teeth can. So, processing both the emptiness with a wise person, as well as when you start to feel feelings and thoughts emerge is very important. Do not go through the emptiness alone, or what emerges alone.
If you can find some creativeness of your own: give your emptiness a name. Draw, use a phrase to help you through, find a song. All these can help. The writings of the sages about emptiness immensely helped me; and, I hope the poetry and music you find here provides you some support. And remember, even if you still do not fully realize it, That Love Which is Intimately Present and Infinite is holding you through the emptiness. I found that difficult to hold onto at times, but kept reaching. The Love was there, but my own ache blocked the thought that such intimate support could actually be present. The reaching always brought me through. So, keep reaching to those who lovingly respond, and to Love itself.